I was brought up as a Muslim and we were told that Islam is the final and the most authoritative religion out there and we were really really proud of being a Muslim so from a young age I remember they were told to and we thought to read the Koran we were told that we were supposed to be her rehearsal and we supposed to memorize the verses so from a young age we all expose to a community and a society that was predominantly Islamic and we learned about the laws the Shariat the rules the do’s and the don’ts and it became second nature for us to just basically follow it so whenever we were dealing with people who are non-muslim we were always told and the society was always had this notion that we have to look down upon them because they are not exactly perfect because they do not have what we have and of course as a good Muslim we’re supposed to basically tell them that it should convert from their belief into Islam and coming to the brotherhood of Islam but again that was that was what we were brought up with that it is a final authority a lot was a very vengeful God that we all had to fear Allah and if we did not obey Allah and I lost many rules then we were surely to be shot down either by men or by God himself and we always had the fear of afterlife that if we did not obey Allah and a lost rules and the prophets rules then for sure we’ll end up in hell I remember my early teen years I was introduced to different cultures because of traveling and we came across different religions the predominately Christians and also Jews and I started being curious because I was always told that they’re forbidden it’s like the forbidden Apple the forbidden fruit of the tree that you’re not supposed to touch and that’s a major sin but I was very very much encouraged in a way like the deep inside there was a voice there was a notion that that told me that there is something that is official about these people that is contradictory to the belief that I was I had and I was taught to have these people were curiously loving and it was really amazing because it’s true Christian somebody who truly believed in their faith they were practically blameless and their God was blameless and the belief was blameless that was interesting to me there was something about this Jesus that made me very curious he talked about love and he said if somebody does you’re wrong love them now that is totally in contradiction to what I was told and so the religion that I was brought up with and I believe in with every fiber of my being because what I was thought is if somebody is not of your nature of your mind of your belief then they’re infidels but here comes Christ and says you know what you have to love your enemies and that is a message that that was just such an warm message to my heart but I wanted to embrace it but I had to fear because it was very difficult to go against what you have believed in for many years and and and the roots and the culture that is so deeply bullying in your belief say it was extremely difficult for me to leave what I had and grasp this new ideology one night Maya my mother had a dream and a dream was about Christ now mind you let me take you back that the marriage that my parents had was not a good marriage the love and passion was not there anymore so there was a constant struggle between my mom and dad and that was something that I remember we used to run away from so years after my mom had a dream and the dream was about Christ calling her to come to her now my mom had never ever gone to church it was just amazing so without getting involved into her in her dream my mom gave her heart to Christ and in a matter of a few weeks we started seeing a fundamental change in my mom in her actions in the way she would retaliate towards my father before that she would retaliate with harshness with unforgiveness but then after she started giving her heart to Christ we started seeing a lot of sacrifice a lot of love it’s as if she had in depth of her soul this this spring that kept on giving her nourishing her in love and sacrifice my father came to me I said what is wrong with your mom is she okay maybe she has some kind of psychological problem and we were all shocked but we realized that the nature of my mom had been transferred transformed from somebody

who was unforgiving and bitter to somebody whose loving aunt and there was nothing but sacrificial love and she had this thirst to read this this book called the Bible so after a while about six months of the struggling with this whole thing and denying it for myself they are basically bowed down and I said God I don’t know you I don’t know Jesus at his teachings I don’t know this yahuveh but me not this is not the same at all there’s nothing that that these two beliefs share with each other and I’m confused and I don’t know what to choose but God I cannot deny the changes that I see in front of my own eyes in my own house with my mom and my dad although I’m afraid I’m very afraid to grasp you Jesus but I want the same thing that my mom has and if it’s Jesus then I want it and from that moment on my life started changing it was that simple there was a lot of fear a fear of not being accepted fear of going against the norm the standard when we actually see your own household changes things you just cannot deny with your own mom with your own parents it’s not somebody else from outside coming and trying to brainwash you it’s not somebody trying to evangelize you and force you to accept their religion and they believe it’s a genuine thing it’s for real in your own household and there is no way to deny it that’s something that I want it and that’s something that changed my family and my life well what do I mean really change my home when I say change mine in my life although of I was a Muslim and I knew better where the laws are but just like many many many other Muslims I did not follow it I only applied it to me when he served my purpose what do I mean I I don’t mean with any disrespect so any other Muslim but at least for me I know that I used to do my clubbing as a young as a young man I used to be involved in relationship have a girl friends I used to drink alcohol and these are all things that that although Islam says is a no-no but majority of the Muslims don’t even follow that I know many many Muslims from many many different cultures that had girlfriends and and drank together and went clubbing but at the same time when it was time to fast it will also fast so it seems to be a convenient thing for us to just go into whenever we wanted to so I was not involved in any anything bad really thank God I was never involved in any drugs or anything like that but I knew that certain fundamental things in my life sort of changing such as the view that I had about woman that they were not just an object anymore that I had to wait and I had to save myself for the one that God had for me so I immediately changed my lifestyle I stopped going clubbing I start head and stop hanging up with my friends I decided to I decided to basically cleanse my life and not to contradict contradict myself I just did not want it and live a certain lifestyle and then whenever it was convenient for me to tap into my religious clock and say now I’m a religious man I needed to be genuine and I remember reading the Bible and Jesus talked about the Pharisees I said these guys are religious people who are so pretentious they pretend to be something else but there’s something else in nature and I realized that religion religion altogether makes us be pretentious people it serves our purpose but what Jesus was talking about was not being pretentious was what was being genuine so I changed my lifestyle my values change I I stuck those relationships I stopped even lying because we know that sometimes I’m in small white flies we call them could could help even the small little things I decided to put aside and those those are the things that slowly but surely started giving me a new identity a new meaning and new gold if you feel me let me talk about understanding different religions other than Islam it becomes a very difficult choice for many Muslims so a message that I have for my for my beloved Muslim friends and family hands and those who are watching this program is this that when we hear about different religions especially Christianity all of a sudden the walls of doubt go up we need to dis friend differentiate and see are we afraid of the notion of Christianity because we were told to be afraid what are we afraid because we truly don’t

understand it I just would like to encourage them to pick up the Bible and I read it be objective by reading it see if it’s something that you truly understand and if it’s if it’s not something that you don’t believe in then that is fine at least you have made an educated decision but for us to make a decision based on what we were told or based on fear or based on the standards that was forced upon us it allows us to not be free people and it allows us to be in bondage of our own thoughts and ideology and when we are in bondage and prisoners to our own thoughts then at that time we become prisoners to other cultures and other people and we never see ourselves as free people when I found Christ I realized that all those doubts all those fears all those angers that was a heart issue Jesus looks at our heart and he says I want your heart and in a heart that is dedicated to God we cannot be any fear there cannot be any anger they cannot be any hatred because if Christ accepted me just the way I was somebody who was a wretched man somebody who did not like others and I stuck to his own belief if he accepted me with such an open arm then how much more do I need to accept others it is not a matter of politics is not a matter of religious differences it’s a matter of heart I used to pray 5 times a day and to read the Quran and I thought all kinds of books about the Quran and I was trying just to to understand it and we all went sometimes to the mosque and we fasted Ramadan and we used to sit and read the Quran together so this I was the first who started being serious about this religion and all my cousins and my sisters and my brother just followed after and we became quite religious family I used to pray and pray and even talk personally to God which is a new tradition in the Islamic religion that you can talk to God why not not just pray five times a day I started talking to God and just expressing my feelings and I was worried that especially that I used to think I’m going to paradise or to hell and this idea made me feel of a much much bigger because I didn’t have the assurance that I’m going to have because nothing in the Quran gave me this thing so there was this uncertainty when it comes to hell or heaven they used to have a dream about the day of judgement and things didn’t go well for me even though I used to just to try to be a good person but I felt no there is something missing in the picture and I couldn’t figure out what is missing at the certain point things really went very very bad and I could see evil spirits so I was really tear mender and I couldn’t heal please I read more the Quran it didn’t work until I met a Christian friend who told me about her story and her story was little bit like my story she used to have a lot of problems she was not Muslim but she had her story looks like my story little bit and she gave me the Bible and I started reading the Bible and she prayed for me and actually I I I couldn’t understand the Bible because I when I started reading it the first time I was not really involved I for me yes it’s the Bible and I read it just to improve my English it was not and there is something else is that are you I’d never doubted that the Quran was the Word of God and this is this was one major obstacle until I read the Bible and I had people just explaining to me certain basic things and then when I started praying with her I filed that things became really great was a

tremendous change they could feel God I could feel there was someone listening to me look like when I was into the Quran I couldn’t feel this presence so and then one day I said okay this is what I am looking for especially that the thing that I couldn’t understand before is that or I didn’t know is that Jesus died for everybody sins so when when I heard that Jesus died for my sins it was like something fantastic for me I’ve never heard about that even my own parents wouldn’t die for me so it was a sacrifice which really just made my my heart snom so and then of course I was I didn’t look backward I didn’t look at the Quran I was just immersed in reading the Bible and I didn’t think about my background because I found already what I was looking for I saw that Jesus belongs only to Americans and to Canadians and but then when I heard about that it was just I said oh this is great I mean he just promised that I’m going to go to heaven once I accept him as a savior I was a little bit confused but actually it didn’t last for for a long time because I found my way and then I discovered that now the Bible is is the truth and the two are so different one of them should be true and one should not be the truth thing so here I had just to choose but then I I discovered that the Bible is the true Word of God I I didn’t have any doubt that the Bible is the true thing so I started going to the church and up to the third or fourth time once I was at the church and the pastor was talking about Jesus as being humble and gentle and chicken he carries our burdens and then I don’t know how after the the sermon finish I went and just I bound down and I prayed and then the pastor and came and prayed for me and she prayed that God would direct me and guide me to the right path and at the time I accepted Jesus and it was just very beautiful experience and it’s I can never forget that the joy I felt what I accepted Jesus was something that I cannot describe because it is beyond any human imagination Jesus really changed my life I used to be lost and I used to seek help from people and going to the these witch doctors who just take money and promise things that would never happen and but now I feel that I am free if I have a problem if I have a burden I just pray and talk to Jesus and He will give me peace about that so and the most important thing is that even if I die today I know that I’m going to heaven because for me going to hell for the eternal life is just an idea that ruined my life and I don’t think that anybody wants to go to hell already the idea of uncertainty is not good one so now I feel peace because I know if I tonight today I can go to heaven without any problem because there is someone who paid the price and he and I I can just live with him forever and I I don’t really now give a lot of importance to through this world yeah I work I do my best and I live this life but the things that I used to see as very very important are not really important anymore so it’s kind of having peace again because if we love this world you won’t have peace because we don’t have enough this joy and this news and this just a new life and you’re sure that there is you are not by yourself there is someone who is helping you and Jesus is here even in terms of trouble so my view of life just changed I used to be

bothered by my problems and but then even when I had a problem I don’t really worry I know that there was someone just with me and he’s going to solve this problem and of course as I was reading the Bible I found a lot a lot of good things and I found that really the words are very deep and they are real and they are not empty words so it’s I had this deep confidence that this is from God and just to think that God is love is another thing that as a Muslim I didn’t know as a Muslim for me God was very severe his all the time and Greece even if you do what every you can he’s not going to be satisfied but God in the Bible is very merciful even if you are not even if you sing he is ready to forgive you and just to to sustain you and so this is how I feel God and this is how I feel God looks like Jesus saved me from not only from spiritual death but also from witchcraft which is really very very harmful and he just his he gives me peace His grace is upon me all the time he watches over me so and there is all the there is only way to the truth is Jesus and for everybody who has a problem or he has doubts about where we are going another day it’s really important to consider that Jesus is the light and he is the only way and there is no other way of having an eternal life except Jesus the thing that I want to share with my Muslim friends is that there is no peace apart from Jesus we we seek God because we seek peace and we want to have eternal life and to go to heaven but Jesus is the only way many people try it just to be perfect and to do good things but really it doesn’t work we should read the Bible and everybody should read the Bible and then make a choice not to regret later on that we need an opportunity so it’s really very very important that you just read it and then you have a clear conscience about it so just pretending or saying the Bible is not the truth in Gori test in change this is I think this is just a prejudice we should look and analyze things and examine and then take decisions nobody can understand how Jesus change somebody’s life until he experiences that his spiritual thing because really them there is a big difference between not being a believer and being the believer in Jesus because he gives you see if he gives everything we need I came from a Muslim background both my parents are Muslim all I knew was about the religion of Islam I’ve never been to a church when I was younger I was only exposed to Islamic rules and and religion and what it was like to be one which was inherently very cultural as well my parents are both Turkish and growing up as one you were raised not only as a Turk but inherently as a Muslim as well I believed that there was only one God Allah and through him basically you got to got to heaven depending on the way you lived your life and it was I guess rated on a on a scale on how much good you did in this life that would determine whether you got to heaven or not that was my belief then when I was 15 years old I moved to

Cyprus to stay with my grandparents my dad’s parents and by this time my parents had divorced and my dad had been remarried and his wife had had a huge influence over my dad and she pretty much destroyed any communication we’ve ever had with my father and that had resulted in him abandon abandoning us and rejecting us my mother was very neglectful to us as well so we grew up a lot on her own and growing up with a pain of pretty much left being orphaned and as a result we were stuck in her grandparents Hills and my grandparents were very unsympathetic towards her situation during the time I was in Cyprus I’ve never stepped foot in my father’s house and there was no one to really support us emotionally so you know we were really suffering my grandparents were very very strict and we were pretty much homebound a lot of the times we were allowed no social life so me my brother studied a lot I actually was very opposed to Christianity I was very sympathetic towards Islam and especially towards Palestinians because what they’re going through and I know this may sound a little harsh but I actually kind of felt a little very much opposed and kind of hatred towards Christianity and I felt it was just a hoax and a man-made religion and it developed some resentment within me in my own personal life from the rejection that I went through and the abandonment and abuse from my parents and the rejection for my grandparents that led me to have suicidal tendencies I on a couple occasions I took half a bottle pills and try to commit my commit suicide and sometimes I’d even starved myself just to get attention I mean we were me and my brothers were just hungry for some kind of attention anything at all I left Cyprus to go live with my mom and after about a year or so we had troubles and she had set me up with I guess one of her clients and had later kicked me out of the house and at that time I had nowhere to live and so I went to go live with his man we dated for about seven months or so he’d go to church a few times and he asked me to go with them so I went and there I was I was pretty much introduced to Christ and before that I knew of Jesus I didn’t believe in him but that I think kind of initiated you need to be introduced to to the bottle and to the Lord Jesus but at that time when the pastor was preaching a sermon I was not receptive to it because there was a lot of her to me and so I rejected it for a while but I came to a breaking point I was clinically depressed I was seeing a psychiatrist I was alone and really I had no one to talk to it was like trapped in this cage and depression is a terrible thing my friend at the time had given me a Bible and it would just kind of sit there collect dust and so I came to a point where I gave the Bible the benefit of dough I decided to pick it up and read it and I believe something just I don’t know something just rose inside of me that motivated me that made me pick up the Bible and read it and maybe it’s something that that I never knew that you know it’s just I picked it up and I read it and I believe the first book I read was either Matthew or John so I started reading it I was alone in my apartment I had found an apartment seven months after living with Matt I was dating and in the book of Psalms chapter 27 verse 10 it says your mother and father may forsake you but I the Lord will receive you and that really fits my

life because that verse really really spoke to me and it was just a real yeah I just really spoke to me loudly so I had sat there and decided to accept Jesus into my life so I pray and I accepted him in my life and the most amazing thing happened I felt well for the first time as I knew it and I felt like a physical presence just embracing me it felt like electricity and it felt like I was floating in air that’s that’s how I can describe it that’s the best I could describe it and I knew something supernatural happened and I knew my prayer was answered and from that point on I wanted to seek out God more and more I was essentially looking for hope you know when I was depressed and when I was so just battered out up emotionally I needed hope and I think that’s what most people look for is hope it’s terrible to be hopeless you know you look for someone to help you help someone to save you from the pain that you’re going through when I accepted Jesus he took away my pain he took away my agony and the most amazing thing about Christ is doesn’t matter what you gone through I heard a lot of testimonies and taken from mine no matter how painful of a life you go through and I’m saying this out of my heart he will save you and he will he will take you out of your pain in your agony and his love is not only his love not only sustains you it’s not only sufficient but it’s overflowing because not only do you have so much love for yourself but you could give it to others unconditionally you know and that no one else can do for you not only God you know it’s a gift his love is free and it’s his grace at that but that’s ad that you know that frees you from your bondage and that’s that’s why I I chose God and he’s been faithful all throughout my life I mean he’s really been faithful there were times where I fell there were times where I slept in did my own thing but I got right back up and I persevere because I I knew in the bottom of my heart that I can’t I can’t do it on my own God is such a part of my life he’s not only a part but he is my light you know everything I do I do it because of him there’s a reason for everything I do I’m not living my life because of what I’ve done but because of what he’s done through me and without God I probably don’t want to think of where I would be right now so and God gets all the credit it’s his work it’s his grace I don’t want to brand it Christianity I don’t like to see Jesus as a religion but as a friend as a lover of people I mean he came to establish a relationship with all of us and he came to give us his love and his love is so powerful that it saves us from all the pain that we go through now my experience in Islam and as a Muslim I never seen any of that I see rules and regulations you stalked him that’s just the way it was but there was no no forgiveness I mean no Savior that could take away your sins and that could forgive you that gives you grace I mean when God says I have forgiven you for your iniquities for your sins that means it’s gone like the slate is wiped out you know and in Islam I have not experienced that we all need to be loved now and the Muslim I didn’t feel that and knowing Jesus and having accepted him in my heart he gives us love unconditionally and forgiveness and that’s what we need really we don’t need to stick to these obscure rules and regulations it doesn’t fix us if you like what cures us is

God’s love when you accept Jesus love he tells us to come as we are we don’t have to follow these certain rules before we come to him he will accept us you know he wants us to accept him and he wants us to accept his love you don’t have to fear him because God’s perfect love casts out all fear he will care for you and he will love you because he knows your problems better than you know them yourself and he knows you better than you know yourself he knows your thoughts before you think them he knows the things you will think before you even pursue them so God’s love is fearless it’s perfect and it’s good the will of God is good I grew up in a very simple home from the Shiite Muslim my father my mother was very traditional they they are very strict to their faith to the religion and way is not radical but to just a normal simple she had Muslim people they praised a fast and they do everything like every other people I start having hunger inside my heart to know about the creator and I know him in Islam his name is Allah and I start growing will have the love to that Islam haves a love to Muhammad I just start follow the same direction as easily every Shiite Muslim believe and follow I was looking to the Christian people with hatred to my heart toward them because they are idolized and they deserved to die that’s what I was thinking and as a growing young man I start thinking in a mosque around young people and those young people was a spreading more and more so radical Islam like as a time I’m talking in the middle 80s it was a Amal movement it was a Hezbollah star turn-up movement all the skin and I used to learn about them inside the mosque so I did not want to go with them two radicals way to the phonetic way to a tourists way as you can call it but I was born with always I was searching for God I met a young lady we get together why she’s going to school her car broke down I was standing next to the door it’s another way to school this older lady she was taking some computer classes she passing by and she saw a lady Amazon Glade and wood and she said oh let me help her out so she’s she pick her up to put the school in a way to school they start talking and she she know where she left she Tala I would pick you up you know you don’t have to worry I will drop you up it’s no she wasn’t trying to get anything I was just trying to help her out as I start talking I should tell my boyfriend he’s a Muslim and he want me to be on Muslim this year this older lady she is Colonel if you can he can love us on this one guy and you cannot be a Muslim you have to be a Christian you have to know Christ the older lady say cap means your mind because I visit a Mansour advice they call me and they said which is calling to say hi and they invite me over I went to their home I went before and I was amazed by their hospitality because back in my mind where I come from I hate the Christian and here’s your Christian people I thought they gonna write away at Tarek Muhammad and attack the Quran attack Islam they did not I was so amazed they start talking to me about the love of Jesus Christ they never said a word I can recall for years they never said anything about bad to hurt my feeling and I tell you what they start represent Jesus in the love and loving way the way

the husband treats a wife the ways a wife who treats a husband I just sometimes I don’t know I just about to say hi but actually I’m like begging them talk to me about your Jesus a little bit more but don’t defend me don’t tell me Islam my Islam is wrong just tell me about your Christ your Jesus so once those people start telling me about Christ I start going back to my Islamic books I start reading my Quran I said reading books I start searching more I know their words is going inside my heart so true and my foundation start shaking for two and a half year I’m listening to them they give me so many people they give me movies and one of the movies they give me Jesus of Nazareth and start watching I found Jesus he never killed he actually died for his sin for the sinners I’m watching what Jesus done it’s a piece of my heart telling me Christ he is what he’s preaching about he is son of God He is God in the flesh he came to die for the people he is the salvation he is the Lamb of God he is the way to God but I couldn’t take that decision because I start thinking if I take the decision I am cannot lose my father or my mother and I love – I’m gonna lose my brother and my sisters and I adore thirdly I’m gonna lose everything about all hassan because i know it’s either or cannot be together and I start asking myself Islam is not gonna get me to God and I start measuring between Islam and what price I say start telling me they start telling me the Bible in their words because I don’t want to read it I did not I can tell you honestly I did not want to read the Bible because I know the more I read in it from it is a more I’m gonna be convicted to it and I don’t want that I felt like I’m being drawn to the Bible my foundation in Islam even it was a strong foundation I thought start shaking start falling I stopped believing in Mohammed I stopped believe the Quran is a word of God deep in my heart I start asking start talking to God I said God all my life I wanna hear about you I want to know about you but I never have a connection with you is it you who’s a talking about are you Christ are you Jesus are you I remember I was praying praying and talking to him I stopped talking to him driving my car I start talking to him while walking I start talking when I wake up I start talking more and sleeping but before I start talking on all the walls a sudden I don’t have to stand and pray in the same repeating words but I’m talking to God and I know he’s missing I know he’s there but I couldn’t take the step and accept him one time they invite me over to their church was my first time ever go to church and why I’m going there it was a service and they were singing to the Lord and the preachers to them pretends they talk to everybody in church to start praying for me asking the Lord to move into my heart to take all the doubts take all the obstacles take all the thoughts change my heart prepare my mind to accept the Christ out who he is and I pray the same prayer God helped me God help me God who you are what are you trying to tell me I don’t believe Islam anymore and I cannot accept it Jesus where he is talking about I am in the middle I meant so much darkness help me another member I was in the meeting it

was a prayer meeting I felt the Holy Spirit starting to me you know how much I love you you know Jesus died for you you know how much you’re so valuable in God’s eyes he sent His only begotten Son to die for you on the cross you know you are so special open your heart receive Jesus receiver into the field across I tell you what I lift up my eyes and I saw like like a movie pictures going on about my life and all the sins I was doing I start crying to him I said help me I’m a sinner I don’t know what’s happened but I start praying untitled to him ask him to come into my life I stood that I pray I don’t know anything what’s going on around me but I forget I was in a public place was a lot of brothers and sisters around me all I know a few minutes after I finished praying and has gone to save me thank you for dying across room thank you Jesus I receive you Jesus thank you Jesus you are God you are my lord you are my Savior everybody was crying and praising God i my life is start changing from zip my Bible has become the two of my life the Word of God has become my enjoyment because I know God talked to me through the Word of God and then I talked to him when I pray the Bible has become my guide in my life and I think so much Jesus because he changed me in a daily basis every time I sit front as a Bible I open the Bible I see him I see him and I start seeing what a sinful man I was were a great great Savior he is my brothers my sisters all of you listening right now I wasn’t I know you are a Muslim I know you still the struggling was like all about that he went life it’s in Christ Jesus he is life his life is a booth he is only way to God and God he loves the world so much he sent His only begotten Son to die and cross for you as for me you only can do one thing just one thing recognize what he done in the cross it was Jesus he crucified us for your sin for only your sin just invited Jesus love you Jesus love you so much and Jesus he wants you to know him I know my name is written in the book of life and I know he’s waiting for you tell him how much you need him and I tell you he said Here I am standing in the door if you open the door I would go in and you will be with me forever relationship with God as a typical Muslim Allah was God that was distant he had given me words that I had to follow to the letter and if I didn’t I would be in trouble with him so it wasn’t a personal relationship with with God with Allah he was like I like you as this then he had handed me a send me directions and Commandments in Quran and I had to do it and if I didn’t I wasn’t a good Muslim and he wouldn’t approve of me so no personal relationship just trying to please him and just trying not to get him mad at me by being a good religious person I tried to fill the void ‘no sin my heart by science I was studying science reading books and just

trying to feel that empty are some people do it with poetry it’s an emptiness in everybody’s heart and people do it in different ways even through religion what we are trying to do is to fill our emptiness in our heart with religion and if you’re sincere religion doesn’t do it you know religion doesn’t change your heart it just gives you things to do and try to fill your life with with things with religious duties but doesn’t really change you and fill your heart so as a sincere Muslim once you follow Islam you get to a point say what am i doing and it’s not really satisfying my soul but I have to do it because if I don’t Allah will judge me and I will be in trouble so it will be a lot out of fear to follow religions but it was a period between 14 and 20 22 that I just focused on science I said I have a goal I’m gonna get my PhD I thought I felt if I get higher degrees if I immerse myself in science and knowledge and degrees maybe the emptiness of my heart will go away I found a good job while I was a student a PhD student I found a good job that was paying me paying my way so I had no financial trouble I was getting the goals of my life why I felt still my heart is empty and I said be honest to yourself I talked to started talking to myself said there’s something missing in life that money job degrees doesn’t really satisfy is there really a god I mean I even questioned the validity of the existence of God I said I’m a scientist who has proven to me that there is God and I knew that religion doesn’t do much but I thought maybe I’ve missed something in religion maybe I should go back and study Islam one more time maybe I missed something maybe I should go back and study that maybe there is God maybe a religion relates to life maybe what is missing in my life is God and religion so naturally I thought Islam is the last religion and I should study but this time I said I’m going to study with an open heart I got a cramp and I said God you know I’m sincere I’m intelligent I felt I was intelligent my heart is sincere and I should be able to find you just by reading Quran no other book other books maybe men everything but they say this book God has written so I started reading Quran in a new way in a very open-minded way searching sincerely for God if guarding we are in this I will give all my life to you I almost finished the Quran and as I was finishing I said well I got some more knowledge of who God is and what what Quran says about God but my heart’s still empty I mean I what is this I am my knowledge my head knowledge increases my heart still empty and I told myself well get used to it homeless you know life is empty everybody goes through life empty religious non-religious this is it I said I’m done with the research but something happened in my heart every day I would get up since I’m done God does not relate to life but something in my heart was telling me you think you’re a good researcher what kind of researcher are you you just studied one book one religion and you make your final decision researchers don’t do that you have to study several things and roll books and then you make your final decision so just out of my own pride saying yeah well maybe I should study other books and read the Bible and so if people ask me I can proudly say well I’ve studied them all you know I know all of them and God does not relate to our daily life so I got the Bible and I read some of the Old Testament and then jump to the New Testament to book of Matthew and I said I don’t think I’m gonna find anything new in in the Bible because Quran is the most complete book this is just subset of it but as I was reading a book of Matthew I encountered this man called Jesus who didn’t look like any other man I thought here is a prophet Jesus and he just like Muhammad that means just are the same the okay to tell people to be good and to follow God but he didn’t fit the profile of a cross a guy had in mind he let people worship Him and the Prophet will never do that the prophets say don’t worship Me worship God but he didn’t never did that so I was struggling with Jesus is he really prophet is he really Savior of the world what about Muhammad what about Quran I just struggled for months what I did after a while because I couldn’t make a decision I said I’m gonna go just sit in the church and see what they say after a

few weeks sitting the church just listening a person or the pastor gave a sermon and said he was a question come forward if you have a question just ask me and of course I had many questions and I went forward to to meet the pastor of the church and I started asking question I asked him you know I’ve ever said in Quran and Islam and I have these questions is what are they I said is Muhammad the prophet of God he thought for a few seconds he said well what’s your next question I said is a crime the Word of God he said well what’s your next question how about my grandma she is a very sincere Muslim does Christianity teach that she goes to hell he he taught us is well what’s your next question I mean he asked he let me ask all my questions he didn’t answer at the end he said you know what I do not know the answers to your question but I know one thing faith is very simple you believe that you’re a sinner I said well if the standard is Sermon on the Mount that Jesus says if you if you look at the woman with the lustful eyes you have committed adultery in your heart that’s the high standard I remember the Bible says if you’re angry at somebody you have killed him in your heart I mean that’s the high standard I may not have killed anybody I may not have committed adultery but in my heart according to God I had already committed murder and adultery so I said if that’s the standard we are all sinners so do you believe God loves you I thought for a second said well if God created me then there must be some love because as a student if I do a project kind of get connected with that project maybe we are God’s projects anyway so it’s understandable that maybe God loves us has some affection but do you believe you cannot reach God said of course I’m not complete no no human being can say I am like God I’ve seen I’m not I’m an accomplished person in my mind in my heart I’ve been angry as the Bible says I’m the killer how can I be I cannot reach God a killer he said well do you believe God loved you so much that he came after you again to me I said it makes sense you know if I love somebody and they cannot do something for themselves and I say I love you I step forward and do something for them and if God says he’s loved he loves me and I cannot do anything for myself to reach to him reach out to him so it’s not it’s logical I was going just with logic it’s logical that he would step forward otherwise he’s not love just sit back there and me suffer so it makes sense that he would do that then the pastor said well that’s what he did and that that’s enough you know these few things you believe that’s enough the moment he said that’s enough that’s when I got sick the moment said that’s enough the Holy Spirit fell on me suddenly just things became so clear of the meaning of God’s love the practical meaning what he did for me how he came after me how he suffered on the cross how he took my sins away so I can encounter him and suddenly God wasn’t out there anymore God was in me God was so personal suddenly came as the Bible says if you believe in him your you shall be born again I was born in spirit and the Holy Spirit came right at that moment I felt so much peace and joy I knew that I have found something I have been looking for all my life my heart was full of God’s peace joy and love and this is it God is in me that that’s what I have been looking for I wanted God and now God is in me living in me this thing has changed my life why should I keep it to myself I have to I went I was a shy person I said I have to share this with my family and friends and I started sharing it with anybody I knew of course they first rejected me but gradually one by one they came to Christ also to a good Muslim I would say I really respect you I know you’re sincerely looking for God you want to experience God but I want to tell you something I want to tell you that God is searching for you he loves you and another thing religion does not satisfy you and God doesn’t want to give you a religion he didn’t come to give you a religion the religion is a burden in our lives God came to take away our burdens he wants a simple relationship with us but what what can we do to get to him God says you cannot get to me you can

never be perfect you’re always going to be sinful so what hope do we have and God says I love you so much I see you struggling I see you trying to be good and I love you so much that I came for you I came to take over your sins I came to pay the punishment of sins so what do I need to do God wants you to just trust in him and accept his love his tangible love you know what tangible love is God’s tangible love is Jesus Christ Jesus Christ it’s God’s love in human flesh just greeting out to us dying on the cross and raising up to be our Savior when you receive Jesus you receive God’s love and Sal and your life will be changed put away your prejudice I know they have told us that Jesus is just a prophet Jesus is just a prophet when you study the Bible all the 66 of books of the Bible and the 40 prophets when you read that when you study that you realize Jesus is not a prophet he is God in flesh he is the savior of the world and then you experiencing when you invite him when you pray say Jesus come into my life and my heart instantly this is not when you go to heaven instantly your life will be changed the Spirit of God will come into your heart and you will be full of love joy peace of God was raised in a Muslim family my mother is very religious and she grew as a kid six children in the ways of Islam we want in Quran school I really love that I loved Allah so that was my god I love Allah and I was guilty when I I try to do good and I cannot I do so many mistakes so meaning is taken always our guilty and when I was praying I memorized many many verses of the Quran and use it in my prayer but that was my daughter but when I finish praying I begin to talk with al Avedon to talk to to thank him for my life but to tell him my problems and that was the best moment for me they had this question in my heart why is different why Muslim why question why others and there are the same guy and one day I was going home from from my job so I want to a church I hear them singing and I want inside and I love the singing and they was I didn’t know anything about the Holy Spirit but was singing about the Holy Spirit and the fire of God and I love that sounds but they try to convert I say no I need only to be with believers and I knew I continued with them for many months singing I knew many songs about the Holy Spirit but I continued my prayer Muslim prayer but it was like a duty and I was afraid of hell and it was a lot a lot of fear in my heart not only about him I had a mini kind of I feel even when it was told I was very fear of tomorrow of death but I continued to do my duty to pray until one day in my workplace I met a woman a Christian I observed that woman I knew in my heart she has something that I don’t have she was loving woman always with love always with attention and that attract me she she asked me if I know Jesus I said I don’t know but I know he’s a prophet a Muslim are for us is a prophet she said in is a more than a prophet is more than that in the Son of God I say no I can’t accept that she didn’t

say anything else but few days after she came with a tape she said do you want to listen this I say of course I dictate I went home and I began to listen the tape it was a testimony of a man who was Muslim and how he was seeking how to be saved and he found Jesus in the Quran you begin with the scripture how a Muslim have to go in the scripture Bible angel I said no this is not in the column because I had a Koran I stopped the tape I want to take my Quran and because he gave the Surat I find it our soul I said I was so I continued to listen and he said another Surat about her the angel was given to Jesus because is the direction delight for every believer I say no that is not in the column I stopped again I told off a that unlike seek I found it again soon I was more and more personal I couldn’t believe I ever want to don’t continue to listen but something we have to you know I curiosity maybe and I continue to listen and he spoke how Jesus Jesus how we the Quran said about Jesus with confident of God is a war of God he is kind of God and many name about Jesus he coated many other verses I was more and more moved more and more but I continued to listen and one verse one verse really opened my eyes the the Surat begin God say to Jesus I will lift you up until the day of resurrection and in that day I will lift up those who follow you above those who don’t believe in you when I heard that I said who is Jesus I want to know him and when the Quran said that I want to I want to know Jesus and I decide it in that moment I didn’t know almost everything anything about him but I decided to seek and to follow him and I met this the Christian woman right after that I said I want to go in your church I want to know Jesus I want to read the Bible and she said okay I begin with the Gospel of John and I began to read no gospel never read in my life before never everything I read I believe it it’s like that is sick for all my life and when I read that Jesus died for my sins as hello it’s not possible God who come on to die for me I was such a sinner I say I give you my life and I want to follow you and I was sick for 15 years I had rheumatism and before I get baptized I want to reach out after them to offer my job I had such a pain but I couldn’t go home I have to go to this to the church I went to the church and I believe in Jesus I heard testimonies because it’s why few weeks after I listened the cassette but I didn’t I couldn’t believe that he can he can heal I believe everything is in the Bible but he did it before but I

couldn’t believe that he is healing now the sermon was about faith it was like for the first time I really realized that I really don’t I believe God we live in Jesus but with some kind of limitations and that they are say forgive me you know everything that it is Samuel is for me because you see my doubt for with me but you know this happen the doctor said I will became lame because it’s a very tough disease but you can him today I believe you can live if you want and I went home I had such a pain but when I went home it’s like if I take my medicine away I will find God I say God I am NOT taking any medicine today I believe in if you want you can hit me if tomorrow you don’t heal me I will know you don’t want to hear me but I put all my faith in you and I – babe when I wake up in the morning was him completely him because for 15 years I know the pain and I begin to jump to dance and to call my daughter say well God heals me you and phew if after that I get baptized I was so afraid for dead for many thing and all it took it on you remove it all and when I read that he said is a relic resurrection unlife those who follow him when they died they relive again and I believe in it and I said I’m not afraid anymore about that because I will be with Jesus I will give it God in my heart and you wanted I want to walk Jesus Intendant because he gave his life for me in the cross it come from heaven so that I would see God so that I will be forgiven I will live with him forever as I give you everything everything I was in darkness on you came to this woman and I asked always cut to to reveal his name by his war by Christian or by dream how they want because I know that many love the God that they don’t know I know that it was a God in the heaven a God who created everything I call him Allah I realized today this is the father of Jesus Christ is not Allah I pray that the Lord will give them a thoughts from the truth because if they receive that task to be seek Him and God said if you seek me with all your heart we showed myself to the promise of God and the promise of God is true God is not alive jesus said I am the way I am the truth black beast it was if they seek this will they find him they find Jesus is not heaven is a meal only they have to seek the seeking to ask him if what they are seeking is too hot it is shaking very driven son I have that confidence you

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