I so want to find you To lightly touch your face I will open both of my hands To gently caress your back Please let me have your Lost time Before you cry I will be the one to keep your tears Even if the world stands in front of me, and wildly say That I should stop being extravagant and wasteful If I Can Love You So Episode 42 Okay, okay, Luo Hao. That’s it for now I can’t talk with you now. Let’s talk later What’s the matter with you? Nothing What did you say just now? Are you going to the station? Don’t go. I’m afraid that you’ll run into a lot of reporters when you go there Your mood will be affected. Don’t go I’m not afraid even if I see them. I’m not that weak Kaoer Kaoer! A person’s biggest enemy is himself As long as I firmly believe that I’m not like what they say, no one can break me down It’s also upon reading the newspaper that I found out about the news of Geng Mochi and Milan getting married I have really no idea what Geng Mochi is thinking We cannot let Kaoer know about this Otherwise, she’ll go crazy Go away! Go away! – Go away! – Don’t move! Pin her down! – Kaoer! Kaoer, don’t be like this! Kaoer! – Here – Let me go! – Kaoer! – I’ve swabbed it – Let me go! Kaoer, don’t be like this! Hurry Let me go! Let go! Let me go! – It’s okay now – Is it done? Come, let me I’m here Slowly Let me do that Let her sleep first. Tomorrow, Dr. Cai must come to see her Okay But… she’s been taking her medicine. How come she became like this? Are you sure she is taking her medicine? Yes, she is But something seems odd lately She keeps saying she has a headache, feeling dizzy, and her mood is particularly unstable Why is this happening? Go back and tell Geng Mochi If he dares to come here again, I’ll chop him up! My brother is being forced to do it! You don’t have to explain for him! Look at how she looks now! I’m not angry at you. Sorry Pass the message to him. Tell him that I beg of him I’m begging him Chairman Geng Mochi is here I won’t see him

He’s been standing outside for two hours The snowfall is so heavy. His health How dare he still come? He says he just wants to see Kaoer See her, see her. Every time, he said he’ll just see her Kaoer has turned into that, and he still wants to see her I absolutely will not allow him to step inside here Even if he will die tomorrow, I won’t let the two of them see each other, either Mr. Geng! Chairman, I What are you panicking about? I saw everything Geng Mochi is very pitiful He is pitiful Am I not pitiful? I kept stepping back I kept compromising The most pitiful person is me Mochi, why is your hand so cold? It’s very cold Kaoer. Ultimately, you’ll have to accept the fact that I’ll be this cold When I won’t have any temperature left, you must not cry Mochi, it’s really you I’m sorry, Kaoer. I let you feel sad again You cannot marry Milan I’d rather accept the fact that you’ll lost all temperature and turn into freezing cold, than for you to marry her This will be even more painful than letting me die That’s why Milan is forcing you to marry her You can’t enter her trap Kaoer I thought we’d be happy being together But who knew that I would be hurting you time and time again I thought being apart was better for us But it still wasn’t I don’t know what to do anymore The only thing that I can do is that I’ll bear more suffering so that you’ll bear less No I am your Mrs. Geng I am your only Mrs. Geng No one can take you away from me Whether you die or I die, we’ll stay husband and wife Kaoer, in my heart, you’re always Mrs. Geng And always will be Don’t worry I won’t marry Milan Really? You must make good on your promise Yes Everything will be over soon

At that moment, I knew I shouldn’t say more I hugged this man, while feeling his weak heartbeat and his icy cold temperature It was like he was dying in my embrace I could not hate him, nor could I complain anymore I’m just sad I’ve caused him to be tormented even at the brink of death Chairman Haven’t you already had the surgery? Why do you still look so unwell? What is the medicine that you’re taking? There isn’t a label It’s anti-anxiety medicine I haven’t slept well lately and eaten much It’s okay Don’t worry too much I think Kaoer will get through this I’m afraid I won’t be able to get through it Don’t say that Mr. Geng, Kaoer Kaoer has fallen asleep You tell me What right do you have to still come see her? You should go home. This is my house House? Aren’t you marrying Milan? That’s also my business. It has nothing to do with you Anything that is related to Bai Kaoer, is also my business Look at how she looks now You have once again caused her to be badly battered. This is a fact Milan has withdrawn the lawsuit She won’t bother Kaoer anymore Do you think that woman will stop? She has insatiable greed. She will never be satisfied! I will let all of this end soon End? You say you’ll end it every time. Has it ended? Bai Kaoer has endured so much torment because of you! Mr. Geng, are you all right? How about I brew some ginger broth for you? I’m okay. Thank you, Miss Li You’re pretending to be pitiful again I’m so tired of this playacting from you You say you love her, but you can’t give her anything All you’ve given her is not once, nor twice, but repeated harm Didn’t we agree in Seattle that you’d entrust her to me? Didn’t we agree? So have you changed your mind? Qi Shuli Kaoer told me, as long as I can live for another minute or another second, she would still want to be with me As she has told me such, what reason do I still have to leave her? I don’t want to know what you two have talked about I also don’t care what you two have talked about! I can disregard and give up anything All I want is for Bai Kaoer to live well. Do you understand what I say? Mr. Geng, what’s wrong? Geng Mochi, don’t pretend Mr. Geng! Mr. Geng! Don’t cry anymore It’ll be fine. Don’t cry Is she taking her medicine regularly? Yes, she is taking it on time daily Show me the medicine It’s here It shouldn’t be What’s going on? If she is taking the medicine regularly, her condition shouldn’t have recurred so quickly I prescribed these medications for her. They should be good How long has she been in this condition? It happened not long after she returned from the U.S At first, she said she was dizzy and couldn’t sleep She had nightmares all night And then her condition got worse and worse This medications doesn’t seem to work anymore – All right, I’ll give her a new prescription. Let’s keep her under observation first – Okay Dr. Cai, please help Kaoer

Of course What are you doing here? Didn’t I tell you not to see me, unless I asked for you? I don’t want to keep doing this. I won’t do it anymore What do you mean? This is too evil, Miss. Every time when Miss Bai’s condition erupts, it’s like she is really crazy She is a psycho patient to begin with We’re just stopping her medications, and it’s substituted with calcium tablets Nothing bad will happen. She won’t die I really can’t do it It’s immoral, Miss. Maybe you should find someone else You think you can just quit? You are already an accessory to the crime. If I’m exposed, you won’t be able to escape I promise I won’t tell anyone Believe me. I won’t tell anyone. Okay? I couldn’t help it at that time when I agreed We needed money urgently for my husband’s surgery Quit talking crap. You won’t have to worry for long She’ll be entering the nursing home soon. Once she’s there, you’ll be fine I’ll pay you double at that time, and you won’t owe me anything. How’s that? Entering the nursing home? What kind of place is that? It’s a good place to nurture your health It’s not the mental hospital, is it? Don’t ask about anything that doesn’t concern you. Just do what I say Or else, I’ll expose you and tell them you changed her medications Just do it – Hello – Miss Milan, Geng Mochi was hospitalized last night What? Geng Mochi is in the hospital again? He promised to marry me We haven’t finalized the procedure yet. What is he planning? Then what do you think we should do now? That jerk is playing me! I agreed to his condition to withdraw the lawsuit. Now, he locks himself up in the hospital Does he think he can take advantage of me?! Sure, no one wants me to live a good life Okay, then we can fight each other to death Listen, I want to hold a press conference I will expose Geng Mochi’s true color I don’t care if he is really sick or faking it, I won’t let him off easily this time Jinyi Why don’t you go home to rest? I’ll stay with him for tonight We can take turns. Just one person can’t hold it up Mochi has been through so much torment I believe he will get through it again I’ve been looking for you for a while Huang Zhong, you’ve finally returned I came over right away after I got off the plane. Where is Mochi? He is in the ICU Say, I just went back to Beijing and you guys turned out like this You have the nerve to say that You went back to Beijing and left us with such a huge mess Jinyi and I are about to collapse I have to take care of my law firm There are several big cases waiting for me to go to court I’ve been following up with Mochi’s matter But I just got news. It’s very bad Can there be anything worse than what we have now? Listen. Even though Milan already withdrew the lawsuit, Mochi has delayed marrying her She turned desperate and has announced she’ll hold a press conference Although I don’t know what she’ll say exactly, I can guess it won’t be good What does that crazy woman want? Just let her be. She can do whatever she wants. No one will mind her Of course, we can’t let her do everything as she wishes There are rules in this world Then you tell us what to do It’s probably about the Love Series Yes, it must be about the Love Series Because Milan can’t marry Mochi, so she is showing her trump card Then we can hold a press conference, too It’s time to publicly reveal the truth Instead of letting Milan defame my brother and Ye Sha, I’d rather that we say it openly ourselves My father is the original composer of the Love Series Then this matter can conclude here Jinyi, have you decided? Even though my father never cared about fame or money, and revealing his identity is indeed against his will, but things have turned out this way. We don’t have another solution I believe that his soul in the netherworld will understand me Jinyi is right Then let’s hold our press conference in advance, and surprise Milan Let’s do it before hers. I’ll arrange it Wait. This is not an ordinary event We need Mochi’s consent first. We don’t have the authority to decide Also, we will have to notify Ye Sha’s parents, so that they won’t think that we are using Ye Sha as a shield Get Mochi’s consent? When will Mochi wake up? No one knows Let’s tell my brother about our plan He will hear it Brother What I just told you, have you heard it all?

Wake up, please We don’t have time. We must get ahead of Milan in holding a press conference, to reveal the truth to the media and the music fans You’ve tolerated so much these years You even left the music world because of this matter I must let this matter stop now and exonerate you Mochi, if you can hear us talk, can you move your finger or something? He moved! He just moved. Keep talking to him Mochi, Mochi. You can hear us, right? We’ve also notified Ye Sha’s parents We also want this matter to be over and let Ye Sha rest If you agree, please move. Okay? He moved it. He did He wants to talk Mochi, don’t rush. Talk slowly Cellphone? What about the cell phone? What? Recording? Cellphone… What does he mean by a cellphone recording? Where is his cellphone? It should be in the apartment Go get it right away. There must be something in it – Get off the car. Get off! – What are you doing? No, what do you want to do?! Milan, can you stop for a while? Geng Mochi is about to die. Bai Kaoer has a mental breakdown What is your heart made of? Do you think you can uncontrollably continue like this? I’ve said it a hundred times. I don’t want you to get involved in my business! You hit me? I know men shouldn’t hit women But I have to give you this slap If others couldn’t control you, then I will. Don’t worry I don’t have any feelings for you now I just can’t stand seeing you doing this What kind of grievance do you really have against them? Geng Mochi has merely a breath left You still want to force him to marry you Are you crazy?! You want to know the reason. Right? Okay, I’ll tell you Let’s go. I’ll take you to a place What do you want to tell me that you have to bring me here? What to hear a story? A story? My whole life started to change right there Why? Why? Why is God always so unfair to me? And all of you get so much happiness and care Why? I hate all of you I swear I will never let any of you off

I swear! Later, it was a nice driver who took me to the hospital and helped me call the police They eventually caught the bad guys They were sentenced, but then what? My life has already been destroyed Why have you hidden such a drastic incident from me? What’s the use of telling you? So that you’ll give me sympathy? No, I don’t need sympathy from anyone That will only make me feel lowly None of them cared if I lived or died The snow was so heavy, yet they let me go home by myself They had a party all night. No one asked where I went! So what if I told them? Will it change what happened? Milan I just don’t understand Why do they live such a happy life, while my life is so worthless? On this matter, they indeed didn’t manage it well They shouldn’t have let you go home so late all by yourself But this is not a justification for you to harm others? That’s why I told you it’s useless to tell you You still think it’s my fault. Right? You simply cannot feel the pain and hurt I suffered But when you hurt other people, you are also hurting yourself at the same time! Don’t say it anymore! I don’t want to listen! Milan! Milan! Milan! Zopiclone Tablets Can you wait a bit? There are so many people. I’ll pick up the medicine for you That’s great. Thank you Can I trouble you to deliver it to Elegant Orchid Lodge? Go ahead Prescription What is this? Nothing to do with you It’s Kaoer’s medication I told you it’s nothing to do with you – Milan, what are you scheming? – I’m not scheming anything? How did you get the medication? What are you doing with it? You go inside the car first. I’ll tell you in the car Get in the car! Sorry, Luo Hao You forced me Where is Mochi? He must be with Milan now The rainy season probably has started in Seattle Every year at this time, the rain would start falling ceaselessly But even when it’s raining, the sky in Seattle still looks blue Unlike here, it’s so dark and gloomy Are you missing Seattle? Yes. Why won’t I miss it? Geng Mochi’s grave is in Seattle, too Grave? I know he doesn’t really want to marry Milan. He doesn’t love her He is that kind of person Whatever he does or considers, he’s only thinking for my sake He thinks it’s for my good But he doesn’t think whether the consequence is what I want His whole person is a tragedy I fell in love with a tragedy So my life, as a consequence, also has sunk into an endless tragedy Kaoer Listen. He is playing the piano

I know what it is It’s Chopin’s “Farewell” (Etude Op 10 No 3 in E) It’s the last song he taught me He didn’t even finish teaching me this song and had to leave He gave me all of his love and only owes me one song that he didn’t finish teaching So maybe I’m lucky Does this mean that the farewell between us will never arrive? But through this rain, I can actually see the grave that he bought for himself in Seattle He said, he liked the lights around the bay area He loves that city If you want to return to Seattle, I can take you there anytime I can’t go back anymore I can never go back Milan won’t let him be buried in Seattle He doesn’t belong to me anymore He doesn’t belong to you He has never belonged to you Cathy, the only one that really belongs to you in this world, the only person that truly loves you is me Look at me Cathy, look at me Bai Kaoer doesn’t exist anymore There is only Cathy here Bai Kaoer is already dead? Yes. There is no Bai Kaoer anymore There is only Cathy Do you know that I’ve given you everything that I have? Even my life If I die, the person who should be buried in Seattle is me, not him If I’m Cathy, why am I still so sad? My head It feels like it’s exploding I feel that sometimes I’m awake Sometimes, I think I’m already insane It’s like I’ve returned to the asylum I’ve become Bai Kaoer again Look at me. Look at me really well There is no Bai Kaoer anymore, only Cathy You are Cathy You are Qi Shuli’s Cathy. Understand? I love you so much. I’ve given you everything I don’t have anything left All I have left is a heart that is full of wounds and holes If you want it, you can take it, too Do you want it? Talk Cathy I don’t know what else I can do for you You’d rather repeatedly go crazy for him, die for him, but unwilling to live a good life with me Could it be that only if I die and disappear would all of this end? Cathy, can you live well for me just for once? Do I need to disappear before you can stop being like this? Am I really the extra one? Cathy. Cathy I’m at the hospital now I don’t understand the situation yet The police saw my number in Luo Hao’s cell phone so they called me

Han Zhi, can you come? I’m concerned that it’ll be a complicated situation – Luo Hao – Yingzhi – You’re here – What’s wrong with Luo Hao? I don’t know. Doctor, please take a look – How is he? – It’s all right. He is unconscious – Is it serious? – You don’t need to worry When he first arrived, I did a CT scan on his head He has internal bleeding. We’ll continue to monitor He needs to rest. Don’t bother him Just take good care of him – Okay, thank you – Thank you What happened? I’m puzzled, too Luo Hao is a friendly person. He doesn’t have any enemies Who would hit him so hard like this? Forget it, it’s not up to us to worry about that When he wakes up, the police will come and take his statement. We’ll find out at that time That’s all we can do then Yingzhi, how about you go back and take care of Miss Bai I’ll hire an aide for him Miss Bai’s condition has improved a lot these past few days Maybe the new medication prescribed by the doctor is working Then let me call Chairman to see if I need to go back Okay All right, I understand I know about that. I’ll arrange it right away Okay. Goodbye Yingzhi, what are you doing here? I’m here to see a friend who got injured How is Mr. Geng? He just came out of the ICU today He has been transferred to a VIP room We originally wanted to take him to Beijing, but we were afraid that something would happen on the way So, we’ll keep him under observation here for a while There is no solution now, so we can only keep him under conservative therapy I haven’t told Kaoer about Mr. Geng being hospitalized Please don’t tell her If you tell her, she definitely won’t be able to handle it Is she getting better? Much better You didn’t see her the first few days. Her mental state was terrible. We were so worried It’s good that she’s better now I hope she’ll recover soon By the way, what’s going on with Milan? Has she come over to bother Mr. Geng? I haven’t seen her the past few days But I heard she is going to hold a press conference She is probably going to smear my brother again Then what do you plan to do? Don’t worry. We’ll find a way I won’t allow her to hurt my brother and Kaoer again That’s good then Kaoer can’t take on any little bit of provocation Milan should stop now All news and media friends, greetings I am Mr. Geng Mochi’s manager. My name is Wei Minglun The original composer of the Love Series has been under suspicion and dispute for several years Mr. Geng Mochi stayed silent about this matter because he was respecting the deceased For that, he was forced to leave the music world five years ago In recent years, someone has been maliciously defaming and hyping this issue Therefore, Mr. Geng Mochi has decided not to stay silent anymore He feels that he should respond to the media and his music fans I will, therefore, read a statement on behalf of Mr. Geng Mochi I, Geng Mochi, ever since the Love Series was released, it has been supported and liked by many music fans Five years ago, the discussion and dispute about the Love Series’ original composer became prevalent The listed composer, Ms. Ye Sha, committed suicide because of this As you all know, I was married with Ye Sha for several years Her departure should have alerted me to bravely admit my mistake and reveal the truth However, limited by the various factors at the time, I had to stay silent Now, my life has entered a countdown towards the end I hope to give a formal response to the public The real composer of Love Series is Mr. He Chengxuan How could it be him? – Madam, you’re up? – I need to go to work. I’m late Madam, you can’t go out like that! I’ve already left my job I’m not working anymore I just had a dream It’s a slight concussion. The doctor says it’s not serious

But I don’t understand it How can Luo Hao get beaten up like that? I don’t know when he’ll wake up I’ll visit him again at the hospital in a little while Go ahead. I’ll look after Kaoer here Yesterday, I ran into He Jinyi at the hospital He said that Geng Mochi has been moved from the ICU to a VIP room Don’t tell Kaoer But how long can you keep it from her? Miss He said, even though he’s been transferred to a VIP room, he hasn’t really improved Under the current circumstances, he probably won’t last much longer If Geng Mochi dies, I’ll take her back to Seattle Cathy – Cathy! – Kaoer! Kaoer! Many in the media now know that Mr. Geng Mochi’s engagement is a complete fabrication I have a recording to play for you here What really is the truth? Media offline 042 Turned around and left Before you had woken up If I can love you so after many years Even if I must be honest with myself Whether my heart is here all these years We agreed this was how we’d end it All the good that I owed you All the fights that we had Even if there’s no going back All the love still remains No matter whose hand I’m holding tomorrow Or who I’ll leave with next Even if there’s no going back All the love still remains If I realized the present back then Would I still be leaving today? If with leaving All the love still remains Those years, those things, and also the love All the good that I owed you All the fights that we had Even if there’s no going back All the love still remains No matter whose hand I’m holding tomorrow Or who I’ll leave with next Even if there’s no going back All the love still remains If I realized the present back then Would I still be leaving today? Even if there’s no going back All the love still remains No matter whose hand I’m holding tomorrow Or who I’ll leave with next Even if there’s no going back All the love still remains If I realized the present back then Would I still be leaving today?

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